Hubs and I had an interesting dilemma when we got hitched. Prior to sending the invitations, we both worked for small offices – my office had about 6, and his had 4 (including an intern who was not invited).
I got laid off in March, and because we didn’t send save the dates to in town guests (because we knew we’d fluctuate on who we wanted to invite), I didn’t invite coworkers. My theory has always been, if you invite one, you should invite them all especially in small office environments.
However, on the contrary, Hubs’ office was tiny. Two partners, two employees and an intern. He had been invited (and attended) one of the partners’ wedding, so we felt it was appropriate to invite the three of them (two with spouses).
We sent out our invitations on a Thursday. Saturday, we traveled up to Connecticut for my bridal shower, came back to a flooded apartment on Sunday night and Tuesday I think it was, Hubs lost his job. One person had the decency to RSVP no. The other two didn’t have the decency to RSVP at all.
First of all, we all know that not RSVP-ing is tacky.
But after reading a great article on Corporette, it brought up a whole range of questions about invitation ettiquette as far as who to invite, who not to invite, etc…
I mean, we’ve got parents. We’ve got family. Friends. Bridal Party. Dates (although the plus one question is one of much debate). Coworkers.
But no one really says much about coworkers. I agree, if you work in a small office and you’re close to your coworkers, or if you won’t offend too many people in a larger office by not inviting everyone and inviting a handful of close coworkers that you work with regularly.
Corporette suggests for this particular scenario asking yourself: (keep in mind she was answering a question for a woman who worked in a law firm)
a) do you think you could make partner at this firm?
b) can you afford to invite a lot of work colleagues to your wedding?
c) how do you feel about mixing your wedding (and your grandparents and your college friends) (and any princess fantasies you’ll be indulging that day) with your work colleagues?
Not sure if question A is really appropriate as I wouldn’t want to use my wedding as a place to “create important relationships” with coworkers as she says, but I do agree with the other two questions.
What are your thoughts? Invite coworkers or not?
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I only work with a few people as well, and I’ve worked there for almost 7 (YIKES) years, so it’s pretty obvious that I can’t just invite 2. I’ll invite all 3!! Haha
But, if I were getting married when I had 20+ people in my office, I would definitely only invite ones that I was the closest to!
Since Winston is in law school, we don’t have to worry about his co-workers, but for me? I have a lot of co-workers. And even though I love a lot of them, we simply cannot afford to invite all of them. And I’d feel bad not including everyone.
So, right now, it looks like there will be no co-workers at the wedding. But since it’s in October, a lot can change.